It used to be those words got me excited and energized: back to school meant seeing my friends, learning new things, being independent, and new school supplies (hey, I’m not always known for my depth.) But as I’ve grown older, this time of year makes me sluggish and tired. Maybe it’s the thought of winter, dark days, the onset of my SAD, or that I’m getting older (probably all of the above.) A few years ago, I read “Acedia and Me” by Kathleen Norris and she touched on many of the feelings I experience (there is an explanation of Acedia here.)
At work I’m highly organized and motivated: I manage a team of three people and what we get through our shop is based in a very large part on how I perform my tasks. By the time I get home, I am emotionally and mentally drained; and on the weekends when I have no previous commitment, I’m in my jammies surfin’ my iPad for hours.
I’m not posting this to get “Awwww, poor baby” comments: this blog is an online journal of my distractions and as such I need to post the bad ones as well as the good. I hope that some of the people who read this (and may be experiencing the same feelings) will understand they are not alone, weird, or crazy.